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Vice

by Nancy Babich

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1.
Mary Celeste 03:18
Maybe I've got a problem Something eating me inside Can't put it into words Whatever you say don't feel right This year's running out So what happens now? So what happens now? I feel safe but I'm choking on doubt And life's just a dream yeah Yeah life's just a dream It's cloaked in desires And built of extremes I'm falling through days now I'm falling through days Too fast to keep count now I don't feel alive So what happens now? What's guiding our changes? Cause I can't grasp the difference And I'm choking on doubt And life's just a dream yeah And life's just a dream yeah Held by desires Built of extremes
2.
Rapture 02:32
Cry alone at night too many thoughts to sleep The life seeps from the lies that I've told myself all day I'll shred my false memories But everything else will go with the rest The patterns are emerging I feel compelled to follow I'm starting to let bridges burn I've fed the flames for far too long The eyes of god stare into you with the judgement in every face Maybe they're just memories The people inside my head are not living creatures Just reflections through time I do not want to lie and I don't know what to say I do not want to lie and I'm hiding from truth When you feel everything you will not feel anything When you feel you will feel Nothing
3.
Dissocial 03:18
Everything feels so unreal these days Even my desperate love fades My fears and my desires all cover for each other And if there is no scheme, there are no motives I'm tryna translate to you Tryna make you think it matters But it's all just there in my headtrip I'll drag you into my headtrip Thinking is a harmful habit Thinking is erosion A shameful self directed violence you just can't wash off Everything's been said. Every truth articulated. Every ideal has had its sacrifice. If you wanna try, give it all you got. It will take all you got.
4.
Talk 04:03
What are these words inside of my head Where do they come from and where do they go After they are said After they are said Doesn't she know Doesn't she know What her words can do to me After they are said After they are said What are the words that I can say So I can change what's happening After they are said After they are said I want to know What are these words What do they mean How do I talk To you Even though I can't talk To myself What did they tell you With their words How you should talk And what you can feel I can feel the message But I don't have the form What did they tell you With their words And how does it affect you What do you hear When they're not around I want you to fell What I am feeling The darkness and the light So let's talk What do these words do After they are said
5.
I don't want to disappoint Anyone anymore I am gonna lose myself When I live for someone else I'm living with the population Yet I'm still in isolation Smoke another cigarette Before you mind splits up again Boarding up your windows before the big one comes You'll be stuck inside yourself if you want to be protected The early warning is too distant we're only left with the fear Smoke another cigarette Before your mind splits up again Tearing the world apart is easy Just find the loosest thread and pull Watch the seams come undone and Drift away from everybody else The networks that we live in Are such fragile creatures Smoke another and another Smoke another and another
6.
She sends signals through the ether of the night She sends signals and she waits for a response She's got it all figured out She's so much smarter than herself She's left herself no doubt She's only safe inside She's gone and turned my world around x 4 She's gone and turned me into her receiver She's lost her way, her frame and vision She sends signals through the ether of the night
7.
Quarantine Quarantine Mercy can't triumph over judgement anymore So we'll keep the clock turning till It strikes twelve and starts again ----------------------------------------- These days there is no open vision, but I know it's coming our way. Tighten your belts, fix your habits, control your children with water from a poison well. Tear our your god damn hair. Flesh is something to cut. Choose both evils. Drink both poisons. CHOOSING BOTH EVILS DRINKING BOTH POISONS Fear precludes understanding, and I'm so fucking scared. I know my death is all I've got, and who I am is just how I get there. Limit yourself until it's all that matters. Survival and security will pull us through. Probability will pull us through. Active prevention, more valuable than peace -- and a million hateful worlds come re-emerging.
8.
When the choices come too fast to keep track of the days, it's hard to know what it means to stay true to yourself. The object = the body. The action = the soul. & neither is helpless & neither in control. Neither can survive in isolation. Attention and prayer's all I got. I'm sorry, I don't know what else to do. I'm praying for clarity, I'm praying for closure, I'm praying for nothing, I'm praying for prayer.

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released December 1, 2015

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Nancy Babich Ithaca, New York

(Nancy Babich is a band. It's currently four people.)

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